Welcome Keziah-May!

On the 14th of November I woke up at bout 5am. I knew I had to head into the RBWH (Royal Brisbane & Woman’s Hospital In Australia) from my cousins house at some point that day for clinic. Rang the hospital, they said to come in at about 1pm. We jumped on the train and headed in. I’d had a bit of an achy stomach and back since the night before, but didn’t think anything of it as I had SPD and baby had dropped.

We got into see the doctor at 1:30pm, he checked my blood pressure, it was all over the place. He didn’t seem overly bothered though. I told him I’d been having some cramping and he told me that it was probably just Braxton Hicks and not to worry too much about it. We left the clinic and headed home; the train ride is about half an hour. Me being a smart ass turned to Michael and told him how funny it would be if I went into labour once we were back on the other side of town.

I’ve learnt that I jinx myself all the time…

We got into Woodridge (where we were staying) and i had the overwhelming need to go to the toilet, I honestly thought I had to have a bowel movement. Well nothing was budging on that toilet, so I gave up on that idea and just assumed I had constipation (which I did). Went back out to Michael and told him that the cramps were getting worse and that I was pretty sure I was in labour. This was about 2:30pm. We rang the midwives at the hospital and they told us only to come in if the contractions were 2-3minutes apart or if I couldn’t talk through them. So that was alright, we started counting contractions. They were already 2minutes apart but they felt like an eternity apart! I didn’t want it to be false labour again so we decided to walk the 2km to the shopping centre. Rang the family on the way, figured this would be it. Got about half way and was only just able to finish the conversation on the phone with my sister. Finally got to the supermarket and Michael got me a cup of water from Donut King (of all the places to get water). I’m sitting there looking absolutely hilarious, puffing and panting and I think I was going red in the face.

We rang my cousin and she came to pick me up from work, we had to stop back at her place (where we were staying) to pack my hospital bag and get to the hospital. She was terrified my waters were going to break in the 20 mins it took to drive to the hospital. They didn’t though.

We got there about 3:30 and they put me in an assessment room whilst they found a birthing suite. After about 10 minutes of being very tired and emotionally drained (complications about bub had arisen a week prior) I started crying and asked Michael to see if they could get me an epidural. they said yes, and whilst I was on my way to birthing suite (walking no less) they went to find an anaesthetist. I got to the birthing suite and got into something a bit more comfy. They set me up with some wireless baby heart rate monitors and got me in the shower. It was amazing! However the monitors glitched so I ended up back on the bed. I was 3cm when I got to the hospital. I went 4hrs of established labour without pain relief, just moaning and breathing.

At sometime between 8pm and 10pm I got started on the gas and air. Brilliant stuff. Vomited everywhere but it felt good. At about 1am I had the urge to push (they were thinking of breaking my waters as i was 5cm dilated), so I pushed and broke my waters, I started apologizing thinking I’d done the wrong thing.

After that they gave me a shot of morphine in the leg. Ouchies! That was about 1:15am.

Then after watching ponies running around the room (oh yes gas and air is good stuff), I needed to push again (I’d gone from 5cm to 10cm the moment my waters broke). So I started pushing. another midwife came in and pushed my leg into my hip (I was labouring on my side with a back2back baby) and told me to push. I just wanted to sleep.

She started to crown and I’d sleep in-between the 3 pushes (it felt like sleep but it was barely a minute lol!) The midwife that hurt my leg told me to put my hand down and help my daughter into the world (my normal midwife was brilliant, this other lady was an old bat) and I screamed at her, in no uncertain terms ‘NO!’.

3 minutes after starting to push Keziah-May Danielle was born screaming her lungs out (which was good because there had been meconium in the waters), we didn’t get delayed cord cutting like we wanted, because of the meconium, but Michael cut the cord and they cleaned her up and checked her over and brought her back to be.

First attempt at breastfeeding went miserably. Michael dressed her whilst I went to the toilet. Came back out cuddled her for a bit more then she had to be taken to the special care nursery. Had a shower, went down for a smoke (after that I needed one!) and went back up to the SCN and gave breastfeeding another go.

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Welcome Eason

Lani and Toby, when I met you, you were excited and anxious, happy and cautious. We spoke about your dreams and desires for this, the birth of your first baby.

On February 2nd, Lani, you called me in the early a.m. to let me know that you believed your water had broken. After discussing things, it sounded like it had, indeed, broken. I encouraged you to eat something and call a short time later if no contractions were felt. Shortly afterward, you called to let me know that you were not feeling any contractions but that you were seeing a lot of pink discharge. I reminded you to watch your temperature, stay hydrated, try walking, stairs, foot massage, and nipple stimulation.

You began using the breast pump and stayed active. Around noon, you attempted to take a nap but couldn’t from the excitement. We began talking about your options, including the pros and cons of staying home vs going to the hospital. You decided to stay home and keep working on getting things established on your own.

Around 6:30, you let me know that you and Toby would be heading into the hospital sometime later that evening and that you would call me when you knew more about how you were going to proceed. Around 10:30, you called to let me know that you were having contractions every 15 minutes but were not feeling them and the plan was to start pitocin sometime that night to try to get things moving.

At 4 am, I received the call that you were ready for me. Your contractions were coming quickly (every 3 minutes) and strong. They were completely in your back and you wanted my help. I packed up and headed over immediately, arriving around 5am.

When I arrived, you were standing beside the bed, moving gracefully and peacefully through the timeless movements of the labor dance. Toby, you had your hands always at the ready to support and your voice, to encourage. Beautiful! We talked about your discomfort and where it was at. With the last exam, your cervix was still high and posterior and around 3cm.

We began with lunges, as I had strong reason to believe, from your description, that your baby was posterior as well. After a few lunges, we worked on a pelvic floor release, and then you moved right back up again – ready to get things moving toward birth.

Toby and you moved in such beautiful synchrony, alternating from quiet words of encouragement, prayer, and touch to dancing, hanging, and sitting on the birthing ball, and walking.

After around an hour of moving through this cycle, I asked your nurse’s permission and unhooked your monitor for a walk around the halls. During this, I encouraged you to open your hips and sway, and during contractions, to move your hips in a figure 8 or squat. Once back to the room, they checked your progress and you had moved up to 4cm and baby was nice and low, with babies head starting to turn into the right position.

We opted for hands and knees next, and I sifted you through some contractions, which seemed to help with the back pressure, but it wasn’t long before you were up and moving again with me providing counterpressure to your sacrum and lower back. Your sister, who had come to be with you through your labor, began breathing prayers over your birthing space, quoting Psalms, while Toby loved you through every contraction, praying over you and speaking life over your labor and body.

Throughout all of this, Toby leaned in close to you and you both prayed that your labor and birthing time would bring glory and be a testimony to God’s grace and goodness. It was breathtaking.

Throughout labor, you had attempted to eat, but couldn’t. Coupled with no sleep and hypoglycemia, you were getting to the point of pure exhaustion. We talked about options to try to get you some rest, but the contractions were coming strong and close. We talked about the pros and cons of getting an epidural and how your risks could best be minimized if you opted for the epidural.

If baby was low enough, and had turned well, you were ready for the epidural. You didn’t want one before then, and wisely so, in order to let baby get into the best position possible and to make sure that there were no regrets with your choice.

At your request, you were checked and found to be a good strong 5cm, baby was +1 station and was in a good position. 20 minutes later, your epidural was in place. You soon realized, though, that the epidural that was supposed to allow you some much needed rest was not going to allow for it. You had a window of pain over your right hip. By 11:45 am, we were alternating you from left to right, working on massaging the hip joints, and opening your pelvis through different positions, including the throne.

The anesthesiologist was called back into the room and, around 12:30, he gave a slight pull on the epidural catheter in hopes to straighten it and give better complete coverage. Directly afterward, though, you mentioned lots of pressure down below, different from what you had felt previous.

You asked to be checked again and were complete, 10 cm! At this point, I encouraged you, if you didn’t feel a strong urge to push, to take advantage of the time, since baby was looking strong, and try to rest. You attempted to rest but, after 30 minutes, you felt a good amount of pressure and were able to start bearing down with the contractions.

After a few trial pushes, you really began to get the rhythm, really moving into a groove that you could feel and work with. With Toby alternating on one side with your sister, I held your other leg and you began moving your baby out and into the world.

Soon, you came to that place where you had to decide if the pressure in your womb, or the pressure at your perineum was greater. Slowly and evenly pressing through, you brought your babe to crowning. Slowly, he spiraled out of your womb and into your arms.

Immediately, you and Toby both began speaking blessings and words of welcome over your new son. At 3:09, after 1 1/2 hours pushing, Eason arrived with gusto!

You were a beautiful team, wholly and completely one, working as a unit, from the moment your womb spilled it’s water until the moment your son was placed, slippery and beautifully new into your arms, you were ‘family’.

Congratulations family H! You are blessed!

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To “A”

What a beautiful and majestic warrior you are! I am in awe of you. I was blessed to have met you, to have given you my meager offerings of thought and prose, talismans and tinctures for your journey.

Some may think that a birth journey begins at the onset of labor. But you know, and I know, the journey begins long before that.

Early on in your pregnancy, you packed your bag, put on your hiking shoes, and, asking your partner for his ever-present companionship in the journey, stepped out of your home. You had a particular destination in mind, one that every ripe and full woman has, but found that, the further from home you journeyed, the more your travels required of you.

Chance meetings with other journeyers, forks in the road, detours, Inns, and even temptations to take a carriage ride to your destination all met you, moving in and out of your travels like whispers on your conscience.

And in the midst of this, you began to transform. Your calves became chiseled, your forearms became etched. The fiery red hair that crowns your brow became more lustrous with the wisdom that was placed on your mantel and your breasts swelled with the passion and purity you had buried deep in your bosom.

When, at wisdom’s Time, you came to the Gates, you threw them open with only a moment’s hesitation and walked boldly forward… and down…

It was a hard descent, a raw, emotional, searing, and mid-blowing descent; but you faced each challenge stoically and resolutely – with a pure and unabashed bravery the likes of which I have seen few times in my life.

There were tears.. there was anger and frustration, joy and disbelief.

And there was casting off…

You cast off your talismans, pulled back your hair, and rent your breasts in the power of your Time. The map was cast aside and you were stripped of your glorious garments.

And in a space, in a breath, you were more beautiful and strong then, naked and pure, bruised, vulnerable, and shaken, but strong and able and so wise…

And in your quiet understanding – the communion you shared with your womb – an intimate knowledge, you found peace….

I saw something in you at that moment that will haunt and humble me from this day forward… you had arrived. I witnessed the moment you arrived at the atom, the core, the infinite finite of your souls antapex.

Your decent was over, but your journey was not – and in quiet determination, you brought your eyes to mine and nodded. Once…
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And began to ascend…

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